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Marcela Says Marcela Says Life According to Me

Life According to Me

Letters to Self

Letter to Myself After an Overfull Month

Letter to Myself After an Overfull Month

Dear Me, 

February 2024 was rough. The lunar new year came roaring at full speed toward us,  it seems. Beyond being filled with activities, it pushed us past our comfort zone and challenged us to make a way because no one else in the family would.

From the hospital visit to the wake and funeral of our aunt, it’s more than just researching the best way to reach the northern part of the metro (which in itself, was already a difficult task). It was a mix of emotions I’m not sure we’ve properly processed until now. The whole ordeal was sad, and confusing and left us wondering (but also at the same time hoping) whether she was truly happy in life. And whether she felt loved and loved to the best of her abilities.

angel statue at an old Catholic tombstone
Image by vecstock on Freepik

The common theme of stories about her was that she was a bit on the grumpy side and quick to chastise, whether at work or home. That said, the best description offered about her pertained to her generosity and her contributions towards the education of a priest she considered like a son. I guess that’s already a good thing, and I am convinced that even though I wished there were more loving messages for her during her funeral, she had made the world a little bit better.  

To laugh often and much: To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children, to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to leave the world a bit better whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you lived. This is to have succeeded.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

And then there were the repair works. The Adventure needed a little bit more love this month as we spent time and money on the starter assembly repair. The gate got a fresh new look as the rusted part was removed and replaced. All was good and I’m grateful for the people who did the work, and that we could afford these endeavours. 

But then again, there were highlights for the month. Brother and his family were home for his mother-in-law’s 60th birthday. The celebration was in the province though, so travel took a chunk of their short vacation. Nonetheless, I’m grateful for the dinners and time spent with the family being complete — including the furbabies.

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A post shared by Buddha Doodles (@buddhadoodles)

Speaking of the furbabies, it was also their time for vaccines. It was a little bit more difficult this time as Albus had to be restrained with a makeshift muzzle as he was growling with the injection attempts. For now, we’re just waiting as the vet should be back and ready for the last instalment of their vaccines. 

Of course, we still had our work (yes, even those Monday blues), and house chores — and we still had to make sure all the furbabies were cared for while all of these were happening. Not a small feat if I might say so myself. 

For that, I wanted to say I’m proud of you. There were days that I know you were so tired but you pushed through. There were times when you didn’t know what to do, but you found a way. You stepped up, and even though it may not seem much to the world, by our standards, you stepped up in a big way.

I am grateful for you and the courage you’ve shown this month. Things weren’t easy, but you soldiered on. Thank you so much.

I’m hoping that March will be less busy and there will be more moments to do what you enjoy doing. I am looking forward to write another yearend and birthday letter for you. Make sure you always take care of yourself amidst all these too.

I love you.

Love, 

Me

Written by Marcela - March 2, 2024 - 154 Views
Tags | grief, letters to self, Sad, self-care

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