Dear me,
I write to you in one of the most challenging years of our lives in the hopes we both get something from this: a means for healing for me and a sense of assurance for you.
This year and the next ones after that are going to be brutal, to be honest. I say this not to scare you, but to let you know we came out of it all. We may have despaired at times, but we came out of it whole: stronger and wiser than ever before.
After losing Daddy, it may seem like you have no one to depend on. I know it will feel like the love available in this world has been diminished. It’ll be a year of great grief and big changes.
I want you to know that you are not alone. There is a spark inside of you that has gotten us through it all. A small, faint but powerful force that allowed us to walk one foot ahead of the other during the bleakest of times.
It got us where I am today and you have to trust that.
If ever there is something I’d like to advise you is for you to remember that you are worthy. You are worthy of your dreams and aspirations and you shouldn’t have to doubt that you deserve those at all.
One thing I’ve realized these years is that we are so much more capable than what we’ve given ourselves credit for. We’ve set the standards too low and limited ourselves with so much fear and a sense of unworthiness.
You will make mistakes, some might even say grave ones, but who doesn’t?
We did what we did, based on the best we could do, no more no less. We should be more forgiving of ourselves, let go, and not try to constantly punish ourselves with judging thoughts. So what if we weren’t always able to tidy up?
That’s my hope for you: that you can move on a little bit more easily than I did;— because when you do, you’ll discover that there are a lot of new wonderful beginnings you can explore. There’s so much to learn, and you’ll enjoy the process and rewards of it all.
I also want to thank you and show my admiration for the immense bravery you’ve shown. I can’t imagine having to go through all of it again.
You were brave and I’m proud of us.
I believe that you were able to do all these courageous things because you were living moment by moment then. And I think I should be more like you in this regard.
You faced each challenge as it came along and not worried so much. I hope you continue doing that.
Ultimately, I just want to say that even though it doesn’t seem like it, everything is going to be alright. There may no longer be any more dad jokes to receive, but there will be so many reasons to celebrate once again. You’re a strong, kind, wise and beautiful being, and you’ve always been surrounded by love.
I know that because I can only feel love for you.
Always,
Yourself in two decades
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