I just wanted to let you know how proud I am that you have got us here, halfway through what has been a really mentally and emotionally challenging year.
It was our most challenging year since 2003 when we experienced another great loss.
It wasn’t easy soldiering on day after day with that loss, that grief in your heart, I know. It was torture churning out positive content when all you want to do is just curl into a ball, cry, or do absolutely nothing.
I also know it scares you to explore alternatives because doing so meant starting over and trading all these for what could be another painful situation. You want out, but in a time of so much uncertainty, the unknown is just so all the more terrifying.
There’s no spouse who would pick up the slack, and you’re surrounded by passive family members who easily get offended, and who don’t offer support in any way. There are friends who wish you well, but there can only be so much you can expect from them, especially since you’re barely reaching out as well. These times, most people are rooting down on the family, and there’s not even a rock that you can lean on.
So I hope you remember to look inside because there is us. The you that was and the you that is to be. The parts of you that are fighting to keep us alive, beating, breathing, existing even on the tiniest levels. We are alive, and even though we may not know what to do yet, we are doing our part — trying to survive.
It may be our own life’s race, but let’s take it one step at a time. A whole day may be difficult so let’s just do whatever is in front of us and not worry about time. We are here, we are learning, and we will get through the remainder of the year.
Maybe there will come a time we’ll look forward with more positive feelings towards the future. Maybe we’ll have more reasons to celebrate in the days, weeks and months to come. But until then, we live and choose ourselves.
Good luck with making the decision. We’ll be with you through it all.